Fear of Marriage

I took the fear of marriage from my parents’ relationship, because I didn’t want to end up in a relationship like that, whereas my brothers and sisters learnt a lesson from it and made sure they didn’t carry it on into their own marriages. – John Mahoney

Rakhi is a school teacher, aged 35 yrs, well positioned in a reputed school with good earnings. She hates when getting coarced by relatives for marriage. She is financially independent, free to make any decision, often takes vacation trips to enjoy life. The things she yearns in her life is success. She is afraid to make or share her dreams with someone else. She is happy with her friends, females as well as males. Change the name Rakhi to Ravi, Content remains same. For females, if post marriage abuses could be a reality, similar situation can happen with males. Often the perception of marriage becomes horrifying, once someone hears the news of broken relationships.

The word for the phobia of marriage is Gamophobia. Gamophobia is the fear of breakup, divorce and countless other reasons that stops one to get committed.

The report by Statistics Korea found that only 36.4 per cent of South Koreans, between the ages of 19 and 34, wanted to get married. This is down from 56.5 per cent in 2012.(Ref-WION). A survey clarified the impact of inflation and rising costs of marriage and having children is a major reason behind the decline in Marriages.

Early Marriage as a solution to mishap aversion

Pre independence era and soon after independence, child marriage was very common. A female going out to study or work was considered a taboo. The Apprehension of mishap resulted in quick marriage of Female child. However, Gone are the days when parents used to get their daughters married in the early age of Eighteen to Twenty. Early marriage was the outcome of fear of society. Social Sarcasm, apprehension of female vulnerability, compelled one to tie the wedlock before any possible mishap. Gradually, with the evolvement of societal norms, and wide spread of knowledge, the emphasis was switched to education for the sake of uplifting the life style rather than a single focus on House hold chorus

Changing Values

A whole gamut of growth opportunities paves the way for present day youth to focus more on their personal development which they know very well, will open wide range of avenues to earn money and seek partners who are more considerate and growth oriented. A well educated youth is not only able to communicate his or her opinions to the concerned partner, Also, seek further information, as a team, to achieve, what could be best possible alternatives in Family Growth. Moving out on own has its benefits though combined with many pitfalls.

Mindset to stay independent

The human cosmos, now a days, is filled with information. Education, along with stiff competition in acquiring a knowledge that would allow today;s youth to elevate their position in society requires Time and Focus. They seek a companion, who is equally educated and understanding. This has moved the usual early marriage age of below 25 years to an age which gives the youth the control to decide on marriage rather than full reliance on their parents.

Financial Concerns

The fear of financial burdens in raising a family apart from the exuberant marriage events often compels one to settle for less. The Matchmaking with would be partner takes a back seat and social status and materialistic aspect dominates.The high expectations of commitment from the partner, an idealistic form of mate, often crashes down when met in real world.

Long Term Perspective

Marriage should be considered as a long time affair. Both the partners will have to give time, sacrifice a little here or there to add up joy and happiness multiplied several times. Effective communication is the key to sort out any possible differences.